Mum.... & My Family

Reached home early today. Didn't feel like going anywhere on a Friday night. Mum just came back from her usual 'Offday Marketing' and I met her at the door. As usual, Mum will always keep herself VERY occupied every single minute. Age is catching up and health is deterioriating for her already...

High Blood Pressure, Heart Problems & Feet Pain when walking or standing too long.

Hmmm... somehow I feel bad being her daughter. Hasn't been doing any housework. Mum does everything from Vacuuming, Mopping to Washing & Hanging Clothes to Cooking dinner. She just can't seem to sit down and relax despite us telling her countless times that being tensed can greatly affect her health, in particular, her heart prob.

Mum is a Librarian, a 100% PERFECTIONIST, a 100% HYGIENE FREAK. She cannot stand things lying around. She'll scold me if I don't make up my bed or leave my clothes hanging around. She has a routine for everything she does. She cannot keep things waiting for the next day. This made her very SUPER busy, every single minute, everyday.

To add up to that, she has to tend her stall alone and wakes up as early as 3am so that she can get things prepared by 6am for her 1st customer. She cannot fail to let down people. Too tied up, too obligated to serve, too much work out of (self)pressure.

Ya, I'm to blame right? Didn't help her... She's spoilt me & bro too much when we are young. We do not have to do any single housechores since young. She will nag at us not helping her when she's got her PMS. After a while, she'll be ok.... So on & so forth.

Now that I am 27, I make up my own bed and 'try' to keep my room as neat as possible. It's neat to me but never neat for MUM. Ironic thing is, Mum always find our floor very 'sandy' or 'powdery' when I find it very clean. I mean, she's just mopped the floor yesterday!? We can always settle our own dinner outside but Mum always make it a point to cook for us. Her intention is greatly appreciated & we love her cooking, even B complimented on Mum's dishes! But prob is, Mum is tiring herself out too much... She still takes care of us like kids. She's ought to relax somehow. MORE.

....

Mum says she will not bother about bro & sis' new house. "If they want to tell, they tell. I don't want to ask". Mum added that she can feel Sis don't really like bringing her Indo family to our house. When asked how Mum derived from this thinking... Mum told me, "Can feel it" everytime Sis will avoid asking her family to our house while they are in Spore. Mum feels that we are from a decent & average family, nothing to be ashamed about, so why feel "ASHAMED" of bringing anyone over here?

GOSH...

Mum is sad about Bro n Sis wanting to move out at this period of time cos' health is not looking good still even though she has no relapse of heart prob.. that it'll be good if there is more members around the house to oversee things when 'anything happens.. but she added, "Never mind. I can't be bothered... It's their choice. I've seen it through life"

SAD....

Told Mum about Sis. I still can't identify what kind of person she is. Guess it is the difference in family background & culture, she doesn't seem to talk much at home. I find her very Hostile & Unfriendly to a point. I want to be friendly with her and ask her where she went and discuss things with her, she will reply me... but not interested to continue the topic... I wonder whats on her mind. So fake. *Roll eyes till White*

In the beginning when she entered our humble family, I was really happy I finally have a sister! Someone to share beauty and shopping tips with, someone I can relay my relationship probs too, maybe! I will enjoy talking to her, even how her relationship started with my Bro and etc. I enjoy so much going out with her and my Bro to eat or church or hang around... UNTIL I was so belittled by her when she scolded me for not switching off the wireless router and why I didn't listen to her when WH harrassed me and I asked for Bro's help. She shut me OFF and leave me in the lurch totally. I really hate her at that point. I told myself, this FKG bitch, is not going to gain my respect anymore until she earns it from me!

Till now, she has been very shut off when reaching home esp. when Bro is not around. She doesn't give Mum monthly allowances, only Bro giving his MEAGRE share. I give mine to Mum too. When I earn more or on CNY or Mum's Bday, I give extra as a token.

Ok so much cons about her, consolation is, she will washes n hangs the clothes once in a blue moon. She's pretty, she's capable, she's rich & she loves my Bro.

.......

Mum is sad that once they move out, relationship will distant. (Hey, have I blogged this before? Dejavu ley... :P) I find it sickening to imagine all these. I only have my Bro & Mum as next of kins... If I ever get married, I still have my husband...

Having said so much, I just feel so sick about having my dao-sao. Wo bu si huan ta!!! I don't know why...... its neither prejudice at fault nor external influence... It's the attitude, the feeling of warmth... If it was someone else, life may not taste so sour and so cold at home. :)

Disclaimer: No pun intended while blogging.